Back on September 1, I talked about the corn. What I didn’t tell you is how I almost committed suicide. Don’t ask me how, but, some way, I got my left forefinger in the way of my marvelously sharp knife when I went to chop a corn cob. Way in the way! I nearly amputated half of the top part of my finger (I even got a goodly slice off my fingernail. The kitchen quickly began to look like a murder scene (who knew a finger could bleed so much and still be attached. With no money to pay for a doctor, I sopped up the blood, poured tea tree oil all over my finger, and cut the finger off a latex glove and put that over the whole mess.
The next day, I took off the latex finger, washed the finger, poured on more tea tree oil, and bound the finger with two Bandaids. Should work, right?
Oops! I felt no pain from the cut, but I began to feel intense itching on every other part of the finger. When I finally took the bandaid off that evening, there were weird blisters all around my finger. I left the bandaids off, put on more tea tree oil, and went to sleep. The next day the blisters were scary, so I put on a gauze pad and bound it with paper tape, so people wouldn’t push me off the subway for having a strange disease. Kept up the tea tree oil and gauze and paper tape for a few days. Then I noticed that the blisters kept growing and spreading and had turned red and gooey. After a week, I borrowed $10 from a friend (paid her back with some fermented tomato salsa), and went to the dermatologist, who told me my finger had “impetigo-ized” (all I know about impetigo is that, when I when I was 7, I got mosquito bites on my ankle, and I scratched them too much and I got “impetigo” and my mom put medicine there, and I still have scars.) So my dear dermatologist prescribed heroic medicines, which I obediently put on (I had really expected that he would tell me I had MRSA and immediately amputate my finger to save my life).
I have been afraid to cook or preserve anything, because I know that impetigo is contagious, but I don’t know how much. I mean, if you accidentally touch food with an impetigo-ized finger, could the infection get on the food?
Today, all of the dead skin has fallen off, and all of the blister places are gone. I am still using the antibiotic and the other cream, but I think that, if I put on a rubber glove, I can put up some vegetables this week.
It has been a heck of a way to prove that I am allergic to latex and adhesives, but, at last, my finger is the same size as all of my other fingers and I can bend it. It still feels like a plastic finger, but I am hoping that feeling will go away with time .
Please be careful with your knives.